Thankful

I know it is not tuesday but God has been doing some amazing things in my life.
1.Sobriety- I have been sober almost two months now.
2.Healing- I have had so many people at my church randomly come over to pray for my heart and finally I have hope that God will provide me with a man that wont talk down to me, hit me or push for sex.
3. Starbucks- nothing cheers me up than a peppermint white mocha.
4. Endorphins- I am happy now with the working out
5. Firefighters- Because they save lives and God me blessed with a cute one who praying will be the last boy I will ever kiss, if I ever got to kiss him
6. The sun- I miss it I took all those warm days in San Diego for Granted now all i want is heat!
7. Interpretive dancing- Its so much fun you cant be mad when you do it and its really funny when your sister hits her face onto a keyboard.
8. Forgiveness-I have done some stupid selfish things and people still love me!
9. Love- I love my family my seregate family (the fabulous Amy and her Eagles) and friends.
10. Picture texts- The adorable Ella, my fireman, My best friends boobs when they look fake!

Accountability?

I have not been accountable with my blogging on losing weight. i have been faithful to the treadmill I have commited 30 minutes to an hour everyday to walk/jog. And let me tell you the hookah and cigarettes were the worst idea I have ever had, but with time I hope to restore my lungs and my heart's strength. If I can keep up working out everyday for three weeks without missing I will then be in the habit and it will be natural to me. The diet is a little harder, my mom made my favorite christmas cookies the night I had an emotinal meltdown so I got out of it but i am back on track. I can see my tummy is widdling down slowly but surely I just cant wait untili can fit into my old pants. I have given myself the reward that when I reach my goal weight i get to go shopping at H&M because it is aimed at skinnier ppl and has fabulous clothes for reasonable prices! And I will be able to go shopping without a breakdown of how I used to be skinny! I will enjoy clothes shopping once more!

15 in Six Weeks

I have my birthday in six weeks. over the past six months I gained a lot of weight, From being dumped by a boy I believed to be in love with, Birth control that made me eat way too much and be starving, and then depressed so I didnt do anything, a second degree burn which got me out of the habit of working out, and when I moved out I drank myself to pass out everynight I didnt work, got a desk job.
So I have an adorable guy I was in love with when I was sixteen coming up hopefully for my birthday. So this weight from my previous way of life needs to come off. So my challenege six weeks fifteen pounds I will be running at least four times a week and making healthier choices. I will be blogging every day of how much I eat and my work out so if you would like to help keep me in check let me know or tojoin me in my challenge go for it if I can do it you can do it.

W's

1. Water- delicious and unlike other countries we have it at our fingertips disposal. 

2. Work- I miss it

3. Wonders- not the O-need-ers

4. Wind- When I have a coat

5. Walking- good for your heart

6. Watermelon- delicous

7. White- blank slates

8/ Wikepedia- helpful

9. Winter in San Diego- never as cold as fall in Auburn

10. Washing- clothes dishes I like when things are clean

non album Rocky style

Crazy Eyes, Cocksmith Written on my chest.

Rissa loos amazing, this was the night that we walked out of Rocky (during the same time the bar next door was closing) and a man on the street asked if I really was a cocksmith, and I said not until I am eighteen and walked as quickly as I could in high heels.

V's

1.Vera Wang-amazing designer

2.Vacuums- to clean

3. Vanilla tootsie rolls-the best flavor

4. Vaccines- to keep us healthey

5. Vicinity- much more fun then saying "I am here"

6. Variety- especially in boys

7. Vans- the old kind the ones people live in

8. Vanity- without it i would have no confidence

9. Violence- only when the bad guy gets it in the end

10.Vaquish- sometimes its nice to know no one knows where you are

Thankful Tuesdays

1.Unicorns- especially humping ones to drive my mom crazy.
2. Underwear- especially from victorias secret.
3. unicycles- my friend used to ride one to school several mornings.
4. Unity- makes life easier to live
5. Unbelievable- because sometimes we need miracles to keep hope.
6. Ugly- because it makes me look good lol
7. Utilities- I can take showers, see in the dark and be warm
8. Underwater- swimming is great for your body and fun to do.
9. uncles- I love my Uncle mo for making amazing tacos and telling me fun stories- and my uncle tom for his huge heart taking care of my grandma.
10. Umbrella- The song because it drives alyssa crazy.

T's

1.Spencer T- cutest giant faced baby now grown up little brother ever.

2. Twins-We rock twice as much as you.

3. Tank tops- It is to hot to wear a teeshirt sometimes.

4. Teases-What else makes you excited unless you know pieces of whats going to happen

5. Target- The Zeus of all stores

6. Tea time-With Miss Lucy the Goose

7. Tampering with evidence- How else did OJ get off and is still famous

8. Tangents-I seem to go off on them frequently.

9. Tabloids- You all know you want to know Britneys weight and smoking in her childs face

10. Tacks-They hold the pictures of all the people I love

11. Bonus-Thankfulness-because we would be sad, miserable people without it.

Jenelle Has a Heart?

I have been searching for jobs like a mad woman. I want something that pays well so I can get a gym membership do well in school and quit hollister. I just found my dream job. I would be working with the homeless sorting donations and helping people get back on their feet. Others may view this job as a hassle and hard and you have to have amazing patience. But I would love love love it. 

This past summer I reunited with my alma mater youth group because they do days at the bay and Dave's message was that if you don't concentrate on yourself you will not get depressed. When you are concentrated on other people and helping them you do not concentrate on how sad your life may seem or your flaws as much. I would enjoy going to work everyday. When you are working towards a higher goal you have more to live for. 

So pray that I get this, plus my relationship with God has been numb for about a year and a half so this may help me reconnect with the only one thats going to save me. 

non album late day

This is my best friend Thomas and I on a late night Wendy's run, I have no makeup and he has no manners. I love  this boy oh so much but we did not do well in the picture department

On Faith Alone

Today my boss brought me into her office, I thought she might be mad because I still didn't find that last folder to file the the last piece of paper. She then asked me to sit down and I knew something was up. I was laid off. So on faith alone I will find a new job. Prayers and job oppurtunities will be greatly appreciated. Since it's only my second month living on my own this is completely scary and I dont know how I am going to pull it off. 

S's

1.Salad- China coast with my mom

2.Summer- beaches

3. Suck it- one of my mostused phrases, despite the fact I do not have anyting to suck

4. Salmon-i cook it the best

5. Sass-without it i would be boring

6. Sharkweek-you should treat every week like shark week

7. Savage-most fun adjective to throw into things

8. Sleep overs-yes

9. Salvation-Jesus (handshake)

10. Secrets-i know more than you think and it makes gossip girl intersting

Early Thankfulness

1. Rainbows-from the only ting thag can keep a promise

2. Rocky Horror Picture Show- especially lingerie night

3. Randomness- makes life worth living

4. Rap and Rock music-my two favorite categories

5. Rockets- Sky rockets in flight afternoon delight

6. Running- feel the burn

7. Ranting - I do it a lot ask the twin

8. Rice- asian sundays

9. Riveting-one of the best adjectives

10. Rocks- nice big diamond please

Thankful for Q's

1. Quill, for all of the jokes and bitchiness we still reminice on.

2. Quantity,  I love Cosco

3. Quirks, I hate being normal.

4. Quakers, I like the cheese kind.

5. Quarters you can get sweet fake tattos and plastic jewelry with it. 

6. Quacks, because ducks are cute.

7. QT, who else has a million drinks and syrups

8. Quittage, the hot guy plays it with harry potter

9. Quesidillas, go make your own dang quesedilla

10. Queens because you cant get a royal flush without them

Thankful Ten

1. Project Runway: Because I would hae never been introduced to my future husband Tim Gunn and would not have my everyday phrases such as "Where's Andre" and "fierce, tranny, hot mess"

2. Plots: the make stories interesting

3. Plants: Especially Govna sitting on my porch

4. Prancing: Because walking is way too boring

5: Pockets: to hold my cell phone

6: Pizza: no explanation

7: Pay days: not the candy bar I like money to fill my pockets as well

8: Panera Bread: Delicious

9: Pants: they cover my legs and keep me warm and make my butt look fabulous

10: Padres: I wouldn't root for any other losing time like I root for the Padres

Grandparents day

I celebrated Grandparents Day by shopping for stuff for my apartment and asian dinner food. I then got the calander reminder on my phone that its grandparents day so I began with calling my Grandparents on my moms side, nothing too out of the ordinary, my Grandpa did stop asking questions when I used the pronoun he while discussing shopping with my roommate.
Then I called my Dad's mom (aaron) and all the time that I have known her she has had voice problems when she has allergies, it gets really raspy with her allergies. When I called I didn't recognize her voice,
GL: Hello
M:Hi aunt beth?
GL: No, who is this?
M: Is this Grandma? Its your granddaughter Jenelle.
GL: Oh my goodness, Jenelle its so great to here from you (grandma-ee stuff said)

My roommate then made fun of me because my grandma doesn't even know who I am and I explained the voice situation. And He asked thats really weird I wonder why its different, I replied with Jesus did it of course. Because God does several miracles people take advantage of. Then our cashier begins peraching that there is nothing God can not do, No burden God can not heal and began singing a miracle song. I was so amazed she broke that gospel down. I wish I had known the words so I could rock out with her.

non album thursday

Alyssa and I at 711 i look like a delicious bug apprently.

Thankful for O's

1. The O face (from Office Space)

2. Oreos, double stuffed.

3. Orions belt, just proves God is laughing at your saggy pants.

4. Olives, so you can put them on your fingers

5. Octopus- because I love calamari.

6. The Ocean, this is why i work 60 hours a week to stay

7. Organizers- the tupperwear kind or planners either are fun to buy and maybe use.

8. Orange soda, because it is amazing with vanilla voldka.

9. oregano! My favorite spice (after scary that is)

10. oil preferrably vegetable, it tastes the best in cakes

Friendly Neighbors

So I have begun to meet my neighbors in my apartment complex. Sunday night I went upstairs and hung outwith our amazing lesbian neighbors, they were all super nice and friendly ! We talked about gross nurse stories, one lady that one of the girls had worked with bit off the tips of her figers because she liked the feeling of bone against her teeth.
Then this morning on my way to my car one of the other women in our complex. I said hello she asked if I was new to the building and I said I was and that I lived with aaron and she mentioned that he's a really sweet guy. Just small talk, then it happened, she invited me to a passion party. I told her I would see if I was busy and would let her know. I dont want to be rude my first week of living there, but the expression on my face was most likely priceless. Yay for firendly neighbors.

Shameless

Last night I worked a bunch of girls at Hollister the only guys were our two managers. Unluckily the music would not work right so it was dead silent. We heard all of these following conversations crystal clear. There were some girls left over that were only working until 11, amd than goodness for that. Its not a secret most of think that our managers are yummy, but we talk about it on our breaks with the other girls. One girl did not get that hint, the one about not fratranizing (totally spelt that wrong) with our managers. She was hitting on both our managers. All of us overnight girls looked at her in astoinishment for the things coming out of her mouth. Questions such as
"Do you have a girlfriend?"
"Why no girlfriend"
"Oh I love Abercrombie music too...(abecrombie music is a mix of crappy techno that is fun to dance sillilly to)"

At Hollister you are required to be walked out by a manager every night to check your purse and pocketws to make sure you are not stealing. She was walked out by Chris,the manager from Ramona High woot, and she freaked out because he had to look into her green bag (probably with tampons in it, like He doesn't know what a tampon looks like.) and then she proceeds to ask him to walk her to her car. Which I do not understand, It is 11pm, other stores are done with their over night teams, they are walking otu at their car, its totally safe even at two in the morning, and he declines the offer because he is a manager and he can't just leave the store premesis, she then asks again. Girl is off somewhere, I know our managers are cute but man we aren't at a bar. We kind of just had to roll our eyes and laugh.

My hatred for Canadians

I recently moved into my apartment. I have a roommate I met off of craigslist, yes I am crazy thanks for asking. I usually get intuition when something bad is going to happen, I ususally have the habit of ignoring it. But after meeting him and I even prayed about it, It felt completely right. I love my roommate, we get along fabulously he is super sarcastic, has a mean sense of humor and we like a lot of the smae music, shows and movies.
The other night we were having a conversation Lord knows what it was about (he was in the kitchen cooking me and my two friends dinner how sweet is that) and all of the sudden he goes Roomie: "but I know that you hate Canadians. "
ME"what? I never have even mentioned Canadians."
Roomie: "Yeah I decided that I am going to make up who you are, its easier than getting to know you."
ME: "ok, so what else do I not like?"

Non Album Thursday

This is when Alyssa stole my bed and I was trying to check my myspace and she thought it would be funny to kick me in the face.

Today

I will be literally out on my own. It's scary, fun and sad all at the same time.

Last night was my last supper living in the Eagles household, During dinner Garrett informed me that I cannot leave because "You are like the sister I never had." Which was totally cute despite the fact he does have a sister, a quite amazing one in fact, and she was sitting right there.
P: "hey, thats not very nice."
G: "What?"
P: "I am your sister"
G: "Ok I will change it, Jenelle, You are like the sister I ever had"
I am not sure which is worse. I am not even sure if the second one makes sense.

It will be weird for Amy to leave after moving stuff... I will visit them a lot once work is less crazy.

I did it, I got my act together! I am working my butt off to do it but I am doing it!! Thats the greatest and worst feeling in the world.

I am not too scared because my Aunt Ladonna already said that she better get a call if I think I am going to starve, so I shall always be fed no matter what which is my favorite! I love food!

I think I am going to be able to keep my dishes too....I have to talk to my roommate about it but they are so cute, I dont care I will store them in my room if I have to and bring them out when I have ppl over lol .

I get to join in with two of my favorite ppl on a tradition too! Disney movie and Ice cream night with the Jessica Winters and Sean Hogan!

I love my Hollister job, hate the lack of sleep (woke up my eyes are so dark it looks like I got a black eye, there is a wrinkle in the dark eye too) but love the job. And I think I will get decent hours even when they start cutting after the store opens because I am already the girl my manager goes to when people royally screw up because he knows I can fix it and I know how to do things right which is amazing!

Slutty Slutty Slutty

I was talking to my boss yesterday. The man is hilarious you get him on a topic he is passioonate about and he will talk forever, loudly and enthusiastically. We were talking about marriage and how is wife is all four types of attractive, physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually,it was really cute he truely loves her. Then we got on another topic about missionary work, which I mentioned when I am a teacher I want to take the opurtunity of the summer to take missionary trips (this is actually only semi true, I do not care if they are missionary trips I am ok with something in the peace corps or something of that nature) and he was like you need to live the life of a missionary now, and I replied that I was starting to make changes and then made a smile thinking of my wild youth of the past year. He asked what, personally I am not dumb enough to tell my boss that I used to be an alcoholic was raped treated my family like shit and used men to gain power. It just seems those qualities are best kept in your private life. Then He turns and says well changing the way you dress could be an easy change.

What the heck? I was wearing jeans that hit my belly button a cami (that I tightened the straps so no cleavage) and a cardigan sweater.... I do not wear slutty clothes to work. One time I was asked to pull my shirt up because the undershirt I was wearing pulled down too much..which just to note my mother gave me that shirt and it was the first time I had worn it. I own a few questionable things, an american eagle jean skirt, and a few low cut shirts but nothing down to my belly button and I don't usually wear those items of clothing. I think I am going to just order those puritan dresses that those girls were wearing for the mormon crazy orgy house.

Lets start at the matching shirts. Mine is pink hers is black, matching boys, here's a little story me and my ex bff shown in the picture started picking up marines off base. It started with her meeting one we went to highschool with and they wanted to double date. So I went through about three marines. This was my second one I think. We went down to pb at night and hung out on the beach for the fact that meaghan and I were seventeen and couldn't even smoke hookah yet. Then After kissing mine (and him literally biting my lips not the fun playful way the entire lip was bitten and sore for a good hour afterwards) and him mentioning he wants me to come to texas with him after not even a handful of dates I was not upset we him and meaghan began seeing each other one weekend him and another marine came to stay up in Ramona. EWW my past is not pretty

Killing myself

This is my schedule starting yesterday:
9am Motorcars direct work
6pm go home celebrate Dan's birthday and pack up room.
9pm Hollister job
3am go home and sleep
730am wake up
830am pick up boxes
9am Motor Cars Direct
6pm Go home eat pack up room
9pm Hollister
2 or 3 am go home and sleep
8am drop off some boxes at new apartment
9am Motorcars Direct
6pm Finish packing everthing else up pack up car
9pm Hollister
2 0r 3am go home sleep
10am Motor Cars
4pm POack up van and move big stuff
Pass out
Sunday
Church, Laundry, finish settling in
9pm Hollister
Monday
School starts
9pm Hollister
Tuesday
Motor Cars Direct
Teach a Bible study
Oh my goodness...Really I take if there is a will there is a way to heart.

Don't make fun of kids in highschool

They may be your overnight manager at Hollister.

Last night was my first night working at Hollister. It was actually everyone's first night working in the store. We set up shelves and other things to get ready. I kept staring at one guy thinking I knew him but figured it's probably just the Hollister look. He introduced himself as Chirs and that he was our overnight manager. I continued to work and everytime I passed him I kept thinking to myself that Iknew him from somewhere, but not from Mesa or any of my other jobs.

Then it hit me! Chris Moody Ramona High. He always walked around like he was the king, with popped collar and all. We would pop spencers collar and say Chris Moody it. He won best dressed or biggest flirt that year. And now he is my manager... which is silly. He was wearing a polo but his collar was down, which is most likely the reason I did not recognize that it was him at first.
Small world, I am glad a few others managed to excape from Ramona.

Thankful Tuesday

1. Make up (just to cover acne to fun fake eyelashes)

2. Macaroni and Cheese, prefferably homemade but I love when Jimmy makes it for me from a box.

3. Margaritas, virgin or not they are delicious!

4. Marilyn Monroe, because curvy women are just sexier

5. Maseratis, oh my goodness thats a ride.

6. Music, would seriously shrivel up and die without it.

7. Manicures, because they make you feel better.

8. Moving boxes, because trashbags just don't do it right, got stuff crushed last time.

9. Mike, because who else will drive you up to LA, throw crabs out of your car, give you a nail, and keep the piece of seaglass you gave him eight months ago.

10. Making out, in masses (double m's yay)

Orientation

for Hollister was yesterday and was so much fun. We got to learn about loss prevention and the look policy. Which you are not allowed to wear black(which I was), You cant have nails painted unless clear (mine are sparkley), and you cant wear other brand flipslops(reefs they are superior), Good thing I work overnights and I do not have to follow the rules.

The way to live life

Ecclesiates 5:18-20
After looking at the way things on this earth, here's what I 've decided is the best way to live: Take care of yourself, have a good time, and make the most of whatever job you have for as long as God gives you life. And thats about it. That's the human lot. Yes, we should make the most of what God gives, both in bounty and the capacity to enjoy it, accepting what's given and delighting in the work. IT's God's gift! God deals out joy in the presemt, the now. It's useless to broof over how long we might live.

I am cursed

To be only eighteen yet be more mature than twenty one year olds. I work two jobs go to school full time, I am kind of done with my dumb choices phase. I am trying to rent a room in a roommate situation and no one will take me seriously because of my age. If I could move in with my friends I would but they all ditched out on me becuase they didnt take it seriously. IO know that I am super silly and play at playgrounds and wear moustaches with my thirteen year old cousin but when it comes to decisions on like moving out I think of myself as pretty mature. and if I am not sure of something or have a question I have a network of older women and men (mainly uncle and Dad) to help me out. It just hard to know that I am being punished for having more common sense then most of my generation. I can't get a studio by myself because it would be too expensive and I have no esablished credit, which is a good and bad thing, I dotn have bad credit because if you can't affordit don't buy it but that makes people worry, whatever. I am not trying to toot my own horn saying I am amazing, I still make stupid childish mistakes once in awhile but I take things seriously when need be. I would like to think that I learned something form the past two years of my life. Or else that would have been a waste of God's time kicking me in the butt.

Shopping with the Thomas

Since Alyssa has leftI have lost my number one shopping buddy. Last night I needed to go get some shirts because my boobs have recently grown a lot most of my shirts are inappropriately tight and high. So I needed to go to the closet for undershirts and I wanted to check out the five dollar store down off of college. I know I'm cheap but at eighteen with my two jobs I am not really trying to impress anyone. So I took my friend Thomas whom I love and we have been friends since I was fourteen. There is a reson you take your girlfriends shopping. They can tell you certain colors that are not flattering to you. Thomas was cool in the fact that he was opinionated on what would look cute or not, because dont we dress to impress the opposite sex? But it stunk not to have alyssa to try on the most ridiculous stuff we could find, or go in a dressing room together and i suprise take pictures while she has a shirt halfway over her head.

Codependent

Growing up as a twin I tried to seperate myself from my sister as much as possible. I wanted to prove to everyone we were not a bundle pack. When I met people I wouldn't mention I had a twin unless someone else brought it up or Alyssa walked up. She was the weird one who wore black and I was the one that showed up in short skirts low jeans and anything else that was in style(that my Dad would not make me go upstairs and change). We fought like cats and dogs. The words "I hate you" have been said too many times to count.
Though she recently moved away and I now have an incurable disease called broken heart syndrome (I webmded it I also have heart disease cancer and am pregnant). It took her leaving me to realize she was my best friend in the entire world. Who else can you yell at so hard you make her cry but still goes out to frozen yogurt with you?
So this is my new begining twin free which I dreamed for when I ws younger and regetting today.